Fit to Be Treed

I believe I'm more ready for Christmas than usual.

For starters, I've been reading the gospel of Luke to the boys, so we are already witnesses of the glory of Jesus' incarnation. I'm reading it to them in a version that is something like a dynamic equivalent for younger children, though it is not a "children's Bible story book" per se. It works pretty well for the age range that hear it.

Also, I'm preaching on December 28. This alone gets me in a reverent mood -- I typically start to prepare a message about a month in advance, and I have the luxury of doing so, since I am not a pastor. Usually I preach a max of twice a year, though I did give a Christian worldview seminar this fall as well. Busy year, you know.

Finally, the Christmas tree is up. I would like to say a word about the struggle to achieve a completely vertical Christmas tree in my home. For years we have stored our artificial tree fully assembled (in the off-seasons) in our unfinished basements. We put a sheet over it and call it good until the next Christmas season. When the move came last month, I picked up the tree to carry it to the truck. One of the feet fell out and clattered to the ground. I put it back in, and it fell out again. So I tossed it into a plastic bin and replaced the lid.

That was a sorry mistake.

At the moment of tossing, I said, "I'll remember which bin and put this back together as soon as we're settled in the new house." Not so, my friends. In all the chaos and surprises of moving, I have only the vaguest recollection of what sort of box might have received the foot. We've opened lots of boxes and no foot is there.

So we checked out freecycle. Someone offered a Christmas tree stand, I drove all the way to Country Club Manor (the west edge!) to get it, and it turned out to be a large and beautiful stand for a real tree. Our artificial would not have had the slightest chance verticality.

Then Melanie said she had a stand. Same thing. Lovely stand, for a 12-foot tall tree. The days continued to tick by.

Finally Tara needed some time A.K. (away from kids), so she went to her favorite haunts. She finally called from Walmart:

"OK, tell me what to do. They have a stand for seven-fifty, a six foot but skinny tree for $20, or a 7-foot pre-lit one for $45. The have a four-foot one, pre-lit for $18.88."

So I thought for a minute. I figured pretty much everything except the stand was, ultimately, a waste of money. So I said, "Just get the stand. I'll find a hacksaw and hack off the base on the old one. Have it done before you get home."

And that's what I did. I grabbed a hacksaw, took the tree down to the laundry room, laid it across the washer,and sawed the attached plastic base (sans foot) off, and brought the rest of the tree back upstairs. We assembled the new base, slid the tree carefully into the hole, and voila! We are properly treed.


Thanks to Mary G., one of our fourth grade teachers, who came this afternoon with her spiffy carpet-shampooing machine and cleaned our carpets. For no charge, adds Evan, who is leaning on my shoulders even though he ought to be in bed. Good night, everybody.